False friends:

Biscuit (because here, they’re some kind of weird, tasteless, Southern scone)

Ham salad sandwich (seriously, don’t ever order that here – you’ll get some kind of hideous mayonnaise-coated hideousness)

3/4/09 (is that April 3rd, 2009? Nope, it really isn’t. Just wait until you’ve filed the same set of taxes in the UK and the US, all from the same spreadsheet. The joys)

The things no one tells you:

Fortnight – non existent in American. They think it’s hilarious

Double ‘s’, double ‘n’ (ie when spelling out a word. Instead you just say each letter. No one will have a clue what you’re talking about otherwise. Same goes for numbers)

And the obvious ones:

Pavement (sidewalk)

Moustache (that’s MUS-tache, not mousTACHE)

Football (because Brits play soccer, obviously. Americans play the real game)

Route, router, routing (as in ‘ticket tout’, rather than ‘square root’. Comes up surprisingly often when you’re driving, setting up broadband, and transferring money here)

Lettuce, tomato (that’s leddice and tomaydo, obviously, or you won’t be understood)

Loo/toilet (bathroom/restroom)

And some things that they say that we never do:

Per… (means ‘as directed by’ – you hear it in business meetings a lot)

More to come as I notice them… which increasingly I don’t…